Post Partum Depression

It is Saturday morning at 7am and I am awake but Evie is sound asleep - what is up with that! I thought I would post about ppd while I had a few minutes of peace and quiet. The first couple days after we brought Evie home from the hospital life was great- I thought I was adjusting great to this new, miraculous addition to the family but I was terribly wrong. After numerous nights of only getting an hour or two of sleep I started getting panic attacks and major anxiety issues. I couldn't eat and felt like a train ran over me. Then Brian had to go back to work and I completely lost it- I cried all of the time, I didn't want to hold or feed Evie and I couldn't sleep at all. I was so disappointed in myself for not handling her birth better, for not healing quicker (physically and mentally), for not feeling for Evie the way I felt I should! Luckily, I have a great support system and my Mom, Brian and my Mother-in-law came to the rescue. My Mom came and spent two nights with me, while Maryann took me to the doctors and helped me realize that everyone has a hard time and Brian was supportive no matter what I said or did. My doctor prescribed Ambien for sleep and Zoloft to help with the anxiety and depression. I also seeked help from a therapist so I could get an outsiders perspective on the situation and I spoke with family and friends. Within two weeks I was almost back to normal and at the present time I feel like my self again! I absolutely adore and love my child and I did from the very beginning - I was just to anxious, tired and depressed to realize it. Our life has changed drastically but for the better with the addition of the little monster and as she grows up it will only get more amazing!! I hope this post helps out those that are considering having children, those that are pregnant now and the Mom's already out there- I wish I had known what it was going to be like but no one can fully understand what ppd is like until you experience and it is different for each woman.